She is looking through her window….the outside world seems empty. Nothing seems to be there – void. She pulled her chair back.
“How to be happy?”
The internet is pretty amazing. It has got answer to all of your questions. There are many answers for the question “how to be happy?”
Since her childhood she has been in search of true friend. She had a dream – dream to see the world…dream to see the wonders. She didn’t want to bind herself. Now people tell her she is having psychological problems. She should consult a therapist.
Tear drops started to fall on the papers. She immediately wiped with her handkerchief. Every day seems like a day got minus from her lifespan – nothing else. There is no joy in her life. Every day she prays to God to shorten her life. She knows now her dreams are dead. She is dead. She wanted to be something else.
Her family influenced in her decision making. At each and every step they told her what to do and what not. She listened to her heart and had fights. Whenever she followed her dreams she had her family in front of her saying “you should do this, not that”. She listened to them most of the time. There were exceptions…exceptions brought happiness.
She married at last. She knew he was not the person she had been dreaming of. But she married him for the sake of getting rid of her “family”. She is projected as some one “without brain”. She was without any support when she thought of fulfilling her dreams…the word marriage has no meaning in her life.
“May I come in, Madam?”
She trembled.
After completion of her office work she felt like she is having two identities – she has to give a fake smile and act like a serious worker but deep inside mourning. “You have bi-polar disorder”, the other day her husband told her. “You need to visit a psychiatrist”
Only if a psychiatrist could make her happy again! She had her dreams….now all of them are shattered. Her eyes are filled with tears. Quickly she wipes.
Days are getting deducted from her lifespan. She comes to her office-does her job-goes back to her home-next day again office. She gets paid for her job. Months turns to years. Once she used to motivate herself. “You have to do something in your life”. There was a time when if she was pulled back she moved forward with all her energy. Now it feels time is finished. She can’t do anything. She can’t go back to the time she made mistakes and rectify the present. She can’t do anything except shedding tears.
Her dreams laugh at her from the coffin. She wants to scream. She wants to run away.
She takes her bag. Switches off light. Next day she has be back here again for another day’s job!
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